he cheated me

now i realised a new thing.
jus went to friendster to change my profile
visited his account and found out
tat he has a change of heart

yea..
im was silly and naive to have faith in him
believing in him when no one else was

and now..
this is wad i get in return
sO all this while he was colding me
ignoring me
these are his way of Silent break
which i've always think is a childish method

tmr's my first paper
and he's dOing these tO me
has he ever cOnsidered e effect On me?
nvr..
it's provened..

luckily i woke up b4 i saw these
it was all a fraud..
he was nvr serious abt spending his future wit me
which he said he was

he was e first guy whom i thot i can spend my entire life wit
everything was for show

he displayed his nick last nite:
"i am sad"

it was too
fOr show
fOr anOther gal tO see
fOr her tO cOnsOle him
tOk tO him

aft 8 r/s
i've learnt
finalli learnt

Michelle, u're stupid
u're naive
u're gullible
u're stubborn
why not believe ur friends ard?
why believe him?

i've learnt.

I've learnt. I've wOken up frOm e Dream-turned-nightmare

I've finalli learnt.
think my friends ard are happy fOr me,
I've wOken up from e Dream-turned-nightmare

tOday is suppOsed tO be Our 200th day tgth
but it's asO e day im giving up On him
i've realised tat all my doings, my faith, my love, my time and waiting had gOne dOwn tO e drain.
i used tO think tat bOyfriend is mOre than anything else
my friends disagree
nOw i realised i was wrOng.

Right now, im onli giving up on someone who
doesnt care and
doesnt give a damn to this r/s.
i feel so cheated.
but im glad tat i've wOkened up.

i nOe junyi was sO upset wit me thOse few days
called me at 3.30am tO scOld me..
i have tO apOlOgise..

luckily i wOke up frOm it tOday
tml's my first paper
i realised much Of e nOtes didnt get intO my head
but since aft e waking up..
e study gOt effective
pray hard i'll dO well fOr this exam

Jz tOld me smth meaningful which i'll rmb fOr life
心是很脆弱的，所以要送给值得的人。。。

No more tears
No more thots of doing anything silly
Im gg tO stand up on my feet agn
and be e Happy Girl Once mOre
:))))

gOod luck for his paper tml

met amanda, jz, jason and hOngyi fOr breakfast at amk
i reached 1st..
gOt emO and burst intO tears
hOngyi saw when he reached..
i scared him..
he didnt nOe wad tO dO!

went fOr chicken rice at this cOffee shOp
standard drOpped la..
disappOinted
but finalli exchanged my lenses tOday
aft sO many mOnths

spent mOst Of my time studying tOday
wit serena, jz, hOngyi, yuchen, jasOn and fren
amanda went Out

tOked tO jz and felt better..
he knOcked sOme sense intO me..
if nOt i wOnt have studied sO much..
thanks sO much

but im sO giddy nOw
mb i've studied tOo much
Or nOt enuff slp..

tml mOrning gOtta wake up earli tO chiOng le..
TEC is On friiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
wth~
better nOt fail
thOu i think i will.........

bad news..
mum and dad are bz On CNY
will Onli be having reuniOn dinner tgth
tats all
nO visiting Of relatives
cant see my cOusins
cant see my nephews, Ryan and Royce
im damn disappOinted
is their biz mOre impt?
e festival which i value mOst is Cny le..
but now..

gOtta visit my gOdmOther and GrandmOther alOne wit my brO..
cOme tO think Of it..
it's sO weird..
cny..........

and.. we gOt cheated
i bOught 2 pigs fOr Cny display wit mum and dad last nite
e pigs are suppOsed to mOve wit batt
seller said ther is a white string attached
jus pull
nO.........
dun have at all

he's having his 1st paper tml..
hOpe tat he'll dO well

love jere 1314

im almost breaking dOwn..
i noe im useless..
i turning 18 but i cant control my emotions well
i study..
but i cant focus properly..
study and think of him,
study and think of him..
ended up studying abit
slping earli instead of studying or watching tv
but e moment i wake up
he fills my thots
i cant get back to slp
im nO lOnger sec2..
i cant waste my time not studying agn
i noe..
i've learnt my lesson in sec2
but.. some things are so hard to control

im exhausted..
both mentally and physically
i cant slp well
i cant eat well
i noe im silly..
but i cant control my slp and appetite..

but im stil grateful to all my frens
like nik whO came over to my hse and bought me chicken rice 2 days ago..
kept me company..
enghow junyi who toked to me..
and many poly classmates

i told myself
i'll jus wait for him
study, dun worry so much
but still...
i cant
i miss him like crazy

i was so excited abt cny
but i realised w/o him by my side,
i dun feel it anymore
even gg to chinatown doesnt work

ppl.. dun scold me..
i noe i've let u ppl down
but these are my heartfelt words..
i jus feel like thrashing things out here tonite

I'll lOve him always

Hope everything turns Out well fOr e bOth Of us..
This is e first r/s tat i cherish sO much.
mOre than any r/s tat i've had b4.
jus hOpe tat e strOng determinatiOn and feelings tat we have b4 is stil exisiting.

actually i find it hard tO fOcus On my exam revisiOn these days, i'll wOrk hard.
this, i have tO prOmise myself.

I realised tat vOicing Out my feelings is a thing tat i shOuld stOp..
It seems like u cant stand me telling u
tO u it is jus..
why am i always starting these?

I dun wan to..
but u nvr bOther tO imprOve e r/s
Onli ask me tO rmb tat u trulli lOve me alOt
is it true?

i dun wish to doubt u..
but it's wad u dO..
i've mentiOned many many times tO u..
u'll Onli say.. but u nvr dO..
u nOe im upset..
but u nvr bOther tO cOntact me tOo..

Sakae & Bishan Library

went Sakae @ J8 wit Jingzhi, Amanda and Hongyi

Hongyi and Jingzhi

Amanda and i

hOngyi was e Big eater Of the day..

ate and ate..

Yummy~

CHeers!

Played Open Number and.........

Guess wad?!
Jingzhi kena..

fOrfeit was tO eat a Sushi filled wit Wasabi..

pics time..

he realli did it.. *missiOn accOmplished!

Next was..

Bishan Community Lib!
Newly Opened..
But Hongyi and i have nvr been ther..

i wanted tO leave earli tO Catch my 7pm shOw..BUT the 3 MONSTERS refused tO let me gO!!!!!!
sO.. i gOt abit crazy..

ZOmbie

Crazy gals!!!!!!!!

CNY SHOPPING!

went shOpping fOr CNY clOthes tOday wit Amanda
met her at AMK and saw Carina.. lOng time nO see
hOpe she'll dO well in her O's

1st stOp was Bugis street
where she gOt a pair Of shOrts and skirt
while i gOt a pair Of shOrts and tube tOp
then tO Edge!

we shOpped damn fast!
by 1 plus we reached Far East Plaza
and i bOught a dress, shoes and Blah blah blah...
dress and One Of e tOp are green thOugh..
but im 满足！！！！！
haha

aft Our shOpping was meeting LeOn, Jingzhi and Yuchen.
hOngyi went Off earli fOr his BBq.
HAHA..
GUYS LOVE SHOPPING TOO!!!!
dinner was at Coke Red Lounge
and Of cOs...
it's BAKED RICE agn!!!!

frm e big TV ther
we saw many trailers!
On 1st Feb and 21st Feb..
ther'll be many many gOod shOwS!
yea!!!!!
shall catch mOvies aft e exams!
haven't been visiting e cinema fOr 3 mOnths!
i missed it!

im damn tired aft a day's shOpping and walking
stay hm tml!

我要的不是“SORRY"

until nOw he dOesnt understand me..
wad i wan isnt the wOrd "sOrry"

我很想他 we'll onli be meeting Once this week..

我很想他！

Just gOt tO knOw that we'll be meeting Only Once this week.
thOt we can spent mOre time tml
but we'll only be meeting ltr in e evening instead Of nOon

im sO nOt used tO this sudden change Of lesser meetings
thOugh i nOe he's busy..

im telling myself nOt tO..
Michelle, 加油！